Sunday, July 5, 2009

When Tired, Temptations & Distractions Are Most Appealing

As we draw closer to the end of our current journey, we are finding ourselves more and more tired of towing the line. Exhaustion and months of frustration thrown in our paths creates a strong desire to give up, even though we are almost done.

It's strange how little things that used to easily sideline us in the early throws of this trek into the unknown, have become so large. The desires for more enjoyment and fun have been held at bay during the struggles to avail, but now they taunt us and dare us to veer off course and into the abiss.

We have been existing for the past 10 months, hunkering down behind a financial wall that is demolished, one brick at a time. Now, with very little left of our wall, we are fearful of what we cannot protect ourselves from. How will we make it to the next phase of our adventure and will we survive it?

There are 8 more weeks before graduation. 8 weeks to purchase a tool box and tools. 8 weeks to gather first and last month's rent for our new home, as well as moving expenses. 8 weeks until our lives get turned upside down again, of course for the better, but never the less dismantled and reconstructed.

I am told that over the next several weeks, there will be plenty of overtime opportunities where I work. What that means exactly, is yet to be seen. I got in 6 hours last week. I am hoping that is just the tip of the iceberg.

I think we can find a decent tool box on Craig's List for a reasonable price. Used will do to get started. Soon he will be called to the placement office to begin working on a resume and to find out where the openings are. They start doing it between 6-9 weeks of graduation. Once we have a better idea as to where we will be moving to, it will be easier to form a tangible plan. Until then, bouts of panic strike at ill timed moments and anxiety is trapped in our dreams.

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